An EDA Member Works the Steps (Big Book 502)

These days, I am conscious of when I pick up old patterns, but I am constantly amazed at the new and different ways I can get myself stuck. I don’t get stuck all that often, but when I do, I break out my whole Twelve-Step toolkit and start with Step One. Even though my life has never again become as unmanageable as it was before my first Step One, I know that when resentment, fear, or self-pity start to cloud my vision, unmanageability is just around the corner. I am grateful I now recognize that when these emotions start to rise up in me, I have lost my perspective and balance. I need to be still, feel deeply how miserable I have let myself become, and admit defeat. Step One is an admission of defeat, of powerlessness. And it is not as hard for me as it used to be, because now I am confident that a solution lies ahead in the rest of the Steps.